danziaheartsnirvana

this is a fucking shit show. why do i insist on repressing how i really feel; bottling everything up, putting on a facade, telling people that i'm doing just fine. i really should know better. or maybe it's because i really didn't know any better. tonight, i thought it'd be a really smart idea to listen to taking back sunday for the first time in a long time... and then it reminded me of a drawing i did of adam lazzara years ago. and then i remembered that it was posted on deviant art. and then i read every journal i had ever written here. i read all the poems. and here we are... all those bottled up feelings? pouring out. the facad

if you walk away, i'll walk away. first tell me which road you will take. i don't want to risk our paths crossing someday, so you walk that way, i'll walk this way... and the future hangs over our heads. and it moves with each current event, until it falls all around like a cold steady rain... just stay in when it's lookin' this way. and the world's got me dizzy again... you'd think after 22 years i'd be used to the spin. and it only feels worse when i stay in one place, so i'm always pacing around or walking away... i keep drinking the ink from my pen, and i'm balancing history books up on my head, but it all boils down to one

"cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall." psalm 55:22. i'm really proud of how mature i've become over the past couple months. i'm proud of the way i've handled my life and the way i feel... i'm proud of the strength i have to pray instead of taking things into my own hands. the strength to cast my cares upon the lord and to trust him with all my heart. he has sustained me. i can do anything through him who gives me strength. --- and if the darkness is to keep us apart, and if the daylight feels like it's a long way off, and if your glass heart should crack, and for a second you